Facebook Challenge - Am I Alone? Nope.

Day 5:  The last few days have been filled with getting things done.  I am calmer at night and I am thankful that I have been super productive during the day with my job.  With the super stimulation I was experiencing while visiting Facebook, I often was spinning in circles, starting and stopping a multitude of actions and thoughts in my attempt at multi-tasking.  Can you say, "Squirrel!"?  

Going back to the last few days/months/years, I had contemplated leaving Facebook (yes, I have deactivated my account a couple times already, dating back to 2013), I started to wonder what was wrong with me.  Why am I so affected by social media?  Why does it actually make me miserable?  This train of thought brought be back to an article that my husband shared with me a couple years ago.  He was non-Facebooker and I scoffed immediately.

Not me!  At the time, I was in the midst of daily life with a young infant and toddler and sharing my bliss all over Facebook and conversing with other mom's about sleepless nights and breastfeeding.  It was my lifeline, my saving grace for humor, adult conversation and meme's that said exactly what I was feeling.

Looking back at it now, it is one of the reasons I would get so mad at myself.  I was not getting anything done!   I was so hard on myself for things I started but never completed.  For instance, I had started an online scrapbook/photo album that cataloged all the firsts, usually in monthly posts, of the kids. Using a "blog to print" service, I was able to print out a set of posts to make into a journal/book of sorts.  A wonderful keepsake if you ask me! By the time that I got to Courtney, I had went from frequent posts on Austin to "yearly" posts of pictures.  I did a few posts on Courtney as an infant and first birthday. She is now two and not a single post since. Yes, two kids and a thriving business would make a decent excuse on the time aspect, but the reason for this is likely because time was taken up by my constant interactions and the immediate reward to share them on Facebook instead.  For what?  Those "shares" will never be seen by Courtney or Austin when they got older.  My goal is to rectify this and salvage what I can for both their sakes and mine.

Another aspect of social media that I found interesting and is confirmed in studies, here, here, and even most recently, here is that Facebook breeds envy.  Think about it.  You are sitting on your couch, barely making it through the day, toys all around, kids screaming and on Facebook, your Facebook friend (you met in a group, whom you truly don't even know, AT ALL), is off galavanting in some far off exotic piece of this Earth on ANOTHER vacation.  For real???  Oh, she has kids and they are there in Bermuda as well, sunkissed with Coppertone tans. B#$^%.  Now nevermind, that she had to drink a boat load on the plane to deal with the hellacious plane ride with two kids and that she spent 10 minutes on the beach and it rained the entire time she was there.  The photo she just took was a symbol of what you are currently not doing, wish you could do, afford to do, or freedom to do.  And guess what? Of the 400 "friends" you have on Facebook, 60% are giving you snippets of their vacations, outings, perfect relationships with their in-laws, husbands, and you see their long list "close friends" on Facebook.  Yep.

The truth is, we all know this is not the entire reality, but the more time you spend on Facebook, that becomes skewed.   The next question, is why can some people separate this and some cannot?  Does it have to do with extroversion/introversion, whether you are a Blue, Green, Orange or Gold personality?  The studies haven't gone that far.  Until then, being more cognizant of Facebook's effect on you is a huge step.  Whether you choose to shut it down completely, or change your attitude about what is being presented, both are steps to decreasing the likelihood that Facebook could actually be making you miserable.